For all the sexual taboos that have been dismantled, period sex is still a big one. But whether you're nervous about venturing into the wide world of period sex for the first time or you’ve been an enthusiast for years but still worry about the logistics, we're here to tell you: Fret not! There are plenty of great reasons to indulge in the joys of sex during your period, and a ton of ways to maximize pleasure when doing it.
A lot of us turn our noses up at the idea of period sex, for a plethora of reasons. Some, believe it to be unclean or unhygienic (false). Some think it will make their pain worse (Not always true, in many cases it can actually alleviate pain). Some pass out at the sight of blood (Okay, we will give you a pass on this one).
We have been somewhat brainwashed into the notion that menstruation is dirty, unclean or should be suppressed. This dates all the way back to Leviticus 15:19-33. “Whenever a woman has her menstrual period, she will be ceremonially unclean for seven days. Anyone who touches her during that time will be unclean until evening.”. It is 2021, about time we start re-thinking these outdated notions.
More comfort around messiness can break down barriers to sexual enjoyment. Studies have shown that people who have higher arousal are less grossed out by bodily fluids and ‘messy period sex. At the end of the day, if it is you simply do not feel comfortable with period sex; that is your prerogative. But lets’ talk about why we might embrace the unusual joy that is period sex.
Women tend to get hornier during their period.
It’s a blessing and a curse. Changes in hormones can make some women feel more sexually aroused and ready to pounce on the nearest hot-blooded human. These feels are somewhat diminished by the fact that for at least the first few days, you typically feel like an extremely un-sexy, bloated manatee. Sexual attention, and being admired during this time in which you are not feeling at your peak attractiveness can be a wonderful confidence boost.
Can you have sex on your period?
First things first, a lot of people still question whether you can have sex on your period.
The answer is a definite yes. In fact, it can be particularly pleasurable. The hormonal changes that happen during your period—namely increased estrogen and testosterone levels—lead to intensified arousal (and sensitivity). Your vagina is actually more open and receptive at this time, so if there was a position you were trying to do, but it didn't work so well in the past, now is the time.
Can you have oral sex on your period?
Having oral sex on your period is perfectly safe. Your main concern is probably the mess, but luckily, there are plenty of options like menstrual cups and menstrual discs (more on those below) that will help keep your oral action blood free. Oral sex is also the perfect time to focus on stimulating the clitoris, which (in case you need the anatomy refresher) sits outside the vaginal canal on your vulva.
What are the benefits of having period sex?
One of the most obvious benefits of period sex is increased pleasure. “When you have your period, your hormones are in overdrive, which means you might find it even easier to orgasm from touch or penetration.
Orgasm can also help ease any period cramps. “Orgasm will release feel-good chemicals like oxytocin, dopamine, and endorphins—our body’s natural painkillers—that can ease the pain of menstrual cramps and bloating. Plus, some women find period sex to be more enjoyable overall. “One of the great things about period sex is that you don't need any lube because you’re already incredibly wet, which means some positions are actually easier for some women to be in. Some experts suggest sticking to one position so as not to create a mess, but I say go for it.
There's also some evidence that having sex on your period can shorten it. With every orgasm that shoots oxytocin into your body to alleviate cramps, the contraction that accompanies the orgasm helps to flush out the uterine lining faster than if left to its own devices. This isn’t to suggest that one romp will lead to your period being gone by the morning, but it will shorten it enough that you might notice a difference.
Orgasms can ease back pain, cramps and symptoms of PMS
Orgasms cause the release of oxytocin and dopamine along with various endorphins that not only activate the pleasure centres of the brain but can also alleviate pain, including those debilitating cramps. If you can work in a lower back massage as part of the foreplay, you might find yourself a completely relaxed puddle of goo after the whole experience. It’s worth noting that this is not the reality for every woman, but you’ll never know until you try.
It can decrease the length of your period
Contractions of the vaginal wall and uterine muscles caused by both penetration and orgasm can speed the release of menstrual blood. Hallelujah, it’s the cure we have been waiting for! If you could decrease your period potentially by DAYS, why wouldn’t you seize that opportunity?
It forces you out of your comfort zones and is a highly intimate experience.
For many, this might be a completely new and possibly terrifying or intimidating experience. It may bring you closer, and enhance feelings of intimacy between yourself and your partner. It may allow you to break down barriers and really express feelings of love and acceptance of each other in all of your states of being. It also takes communication and understanding, vital elements of any relationship.
Built in natural lubrication:
I’m sure most of you just pulled a face, but it’s true. Particularly for women who might not lubricate naturally as easily as others, menstrual fluids can provide a viscous and efficient lubrication.
Can I get pregnant having sex on my period?
It is possible to get pregnant during your period, so using your birth control method of choice is very important. For women with shorter cycles, 21 to 24 days opposed to the typical 28 to 30 days, the risk is higher. Sperm can live for about two to three days, sometimes even up to five days, so if sex occurs at the end of the period and ovulation starts early with the sperm still alive, there is the chance the woman can get pregnant.
But what about the mess? It’s gross!?
Period sex is rarely as messy as you anticipate. However, the human body is an unpredictable enigma, so always prepare for the worst/hope for the best. Just a reminder that there is nothing unhygienic or toxic about period blood, no harm has been caused to any penises in the advent of period sex. It is still recommended to give yourself a wash down there afterwards. But that’s just plain hygiene. If you’re freaking out over bodily fluids, perhaps you need to remind yourself what semen is.
I’m going to hit you with some gross truths for those playing along who have never had a period. Sometimes it’s chunky. Other times it’s brown. And yes, sometimes it looks like a Tarantino film. That’s just how it is. It might not be ‘hot’ or ‘sexy’, but it’s worth mentioning that being hot and sexy all the time is not the price you pay to be a sexually active woman.
If you’re concerned about ruining your nice sheets, you can put down a towel, or alternatively, do it in the shower. If your partner is a little apprehensive about the idea of period sex, maybe start with the tail ends of the cycle where the flow is the lightest, or do it with the lights off.
Period masturbation.
This has all the benefits of period sex, but without the potential freak out from your partner, and having to be concerned about what they are thinking. As well as you being in control, you can take your time and really listen to your own body, give yourself some well-needed self-care. Same goes for the mess, you can put down a towel, or treat yourself to a relaxing bath. As well as helping to alleviate cramps, period masturbation (and masturbation in general) can help you to fall asleep, those feel-good hormones released by orgasm can help to induce tiredness and relaxation and a sense of calm.
“When the river runs red take the dirt track instead’
Come on lads, this one I just don’t understand. I’m an advocate for all types of consensual and NON-conventional sex, including anal sex. However, there needs to be some serious revaluation if you get squeamish about period blood, but anal doesn’t make you blink an eye. If you would like to spend a week taking it up the butt, power to you babe.
